Sugar Sweet (hold on, I have to throw up) Sunshine

So today was a good time. I set out to get a haircut (never happened. As an aside, I now look like Don King when I wake up in the morning), hit the Greenmarket at Union Square, and just walk around the Loser I mean Lower East Side (ha, I have to hit hard as a soon-to-be resident of the "Lower West Side"). Anyway, I remembered on my way into the city on the F that Sugar Sweet Sunshine is on Rivington. I went there about a month ago and they, admittedly, have some really amazing cupcakes. That's right, Manhattan's hottest trend is now Noonan's downfall.

I visited Magnolia (I'd link to them but they don't have a website) about 4 months ago (with the same friend I went to Sugar Sweet Sunshine with, Robyn, also known as "BS") and was not so impressed. First of all, there's a line outside of Magnolia and some undereducated fool who "counts" the number of people in the bakery and decides how many more may enter. Secondly, you must actually physically pick out your own cupcakes and place them in a box. As most of us have never worked in a bakery, you quickly realize that you're getting frosting everywhere, usually your hands, shirt, shoes, the person next to you... It was a nightmare and then when I actually tasted one of these sonsabitches, they were dry and just suck.

My visit to Sugar Sweet was a much better experience, at least the first time around. BS and I walked in to an empty bakery, a case filled with cupcakes with names like "Sunshine" and "Ooey Gooey". I ordered from the man behind the case and let him handle well, the handling of the cupcakes. Everything went smoothly and the taste was perfect. The cake was moist and the frosting flavorful, not just sweet. The first time was fantastic. Fast-forward to today. I have a bag of "sour cherries" (I didn't realize how different these are from other cherries), a bag of peaches (took about 10 solid minutes of picking through a huge bin to find ones up to par), and my umbrella in hand. I hit up Sugar Sweet, with the intention of grabbing some cakes, taking them back to Brooklyn, and eating them. Smooth transaction, same guy as last time, what could go wrong?

Well, here's the deal. These mother-father's should come with a disclaimer: "Do not consume more than one of these confections in a 24-hour period for if you do, your stomach will turn to Candy Land and you will vomit for hours". I don't know what's going on. I can consume sugar, chocolate, cake, ice cream, all that stuff with the best of them. Granted, I'm not exactly a 28 waist but I'm not pushing the 38 category either. I should be able to handle more than one of these cupcakes; I am man, hear me roar and eat pastel frosted cakes! Yeah, two hours later, hear me vomit. This post is to function as a warning to all you "hipsters", "frat-guys", "hipsters who are too hip to be called "hipster"", and the rest of you new yorkers. Do NOT consume more than one Sugar Sweet Sunshine cupcake in 24 hours. The taste is phenomenal, but more than one will set off a chain of events that should never follow consumption, mainly the "de-consumption" of food.

Tomorrow, I'm getting my hair cut.